On my knees

If there is one thing in life I don’t understand, it’s the way things have changed from the days we were kids.

“I DON’t REMEMBER THINGS BEING LIKE THIS!”

I’m not even going into the freedom we had riding our bikes in the streets, or the fact that we could walk kilometers to the café, buying Coke and a Snowflake using only silver coins without a cellphone or our parents being sick with worry.

Today kids have become nasty and even the “nice” kids can be nasty. Questions come to mind that I’m not sure was questions back in the day.

1 – How do we teach our kids to turn a cheek (because my aim is “what would Jesus do?”)

2 -How do we look at our children with broken hearts and tell them everything is going to be okay?

3 – How do we encourage them to love those that hurts them? How do we teach them to not be “THE BULLY?”

4 – How do we even know for sure which one of the two our kids are? The bully or the victim?

It feels like this is a never ending story….. when and where did this problem get so out of hand? It’s everywhere, and from what I have experienced up until this point….. it starts even before they go to ‘big school.’ I had to walk up to a 7 year old boy after school (so no real supervision) and stop him from basically pushing my 5 year old on the school playgrounds. This child did not stand back and apologize to me or my son, he went for me and told me how my 5 year old was chasing them??? When I asked my son about it, he was assuring me it was just a game. (Everyone was chasing each other so he decided to join in on the fun!) I’m no fool for my kids faults and they are not saints but I also know where they come from, how they get taught at home and that love is the main source of “income” in our house. When I walked away from that child I was at a loss for words. Worst of all the other parents looked at me as if I just committed a crime but I must admit, the beauty of it all was my kids looked at me differently. It was as if I was walking with a special mommy-mask (super-hero) and a cape flapping behind my back.

Sticks and stones may brake my bones but words will never break me…. how many times do we have to teach this to our kids? As a mom of four beautiful kids I have seen the worst of bad fights (no one can fight better than brothers and sisters), playing with words like it’s a sword and I have to ask them where they learn to speak to one another like that? Their fights shock me sometimes but I keep telling myself if I punish them enough (for fighting they get time out and has to sing the Barney song I love you, you love me to each other) when it comes to this they will eventually learn to respect each other and their space. Do we not all teach our kids this at home?

I honestly don’t know why or when the world of bullying got so out of hand. Has it always been like this and I was just blind for it? More and more young kids go as far as even taking their own lives because of this. At the moment I feel fragile when it comes to this specific subject. I’m just a mom that wants to protect her children, I want what is best for them, but I want them to love unconditionally and I want them to be different.

My prayer for my kids are that they will never become the bully. I hope that they will always have compassion and love for others. I pray that when they become a victim that God’s love inside them will be so established that they can stand up and shine or have the courage to talk about it so that the problem can be resolved. Only the good Lord can protect them once they let go of our hands into the world of school and social activities.

As parents we have to listen “fine tuned hearing”  and look  to see signs that would normally not just be visible. We must never tell our kids things like “thats not so bad” or “get over it” Listen to your children. See them. My most solid advice for today would be to never stop praying for them and for God’s protection. 

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